S05.E06: The F Bomb - Page 2 - Teen Mom

Gah, watching Farrah's family interactions is like watching a documentary on dysfunction. Debra can come visit and take care of Sophia and help organize Farrah's closet, but God forbid she get underfoot when Farrah's random friend (who was probably paid) comes over. Like she's a housecat. I had to laugh so hard when Farrah stated that her therapist said she needs to be more assertive with her parents. And then she's all applauding herself for speaking her mind with them. Bitch, when HAVEN'T you said what's on your mind with Michael and Debra? Damn. Look, I know her parents are no angels, and they're probably to blame for a lot of Farrah's issues. But she's a grown adult now. And her refusal to accept any responsibility, and just continue to play the victim, is highly frustrating. And she wants to talk about establishing boundaries? You can't really control where your parents live (city-wise), but a great time to set boundaries is when your shiny mama is asking for $8k for a "liquid facelift". No. I think Farrah LIKES her parents being beholden to her. And then she can just sit there and talk shit to her heart's content. 

Damn. 

I did love production during her segments, and all the side views of her horrendous duck lips. Heeee

So it's official. Cate has gestational diabetes. And then 2 seconds later she's eating fried chicken and proclaiming she doesn't give a damn, because it's "just one day". Girl, you only have a few weeks left. You need to buckle down and turn that shit around! Although, I'm confused....don't they generally do that glucose test around 28 weeks? It's been almost 5 years since I've been pregnant, but I don't recall it being so late into the pregnancy. And just how DID we jump all the way to 37 weeks? It feels like we were just at the 20 week mark with the gender reveal and all that? That's one of my biggest complaints with this show - the utter fuckery that goes on with the timeline. It's really confusing. 

Anyhow, back to the GD. I hope Nova was okay. I hope Cate hasn't set herself up for a life long problem. I feel the girl, I really do. It's not easy to eat perfect when pregnant, but she needs to adopt some healthier habits. She's still so young. But I will say, Tyler still irks the fuck out of me with all of this. I swear, he was positively irate when she was relaying her health news to his sister. He was hovering in the background, just looking pissed! And what man keeps track of their partner's weight like that? He knew how much she was before Carly, how much she lost, etc. My husband couldn't tell you how much I weighed on any given day. Ever. It seems like a really high priority for Tyler, and it skeeves me out. 

I did tear up for Kim and April waiting in the hall as Nova was born. What a special moment for them. 

Speaking of the fucked up timeline, where the fuck did Amber's boyfriend come from? We haven't heard even a whisper of this dude, and then he's all of a sudden abandoning his life back east to live with Amber? I really need to piece together a timeline here. I know I said before that my relationship went quick and we've now got almost 10 years under our belts....but neither of us had a child. Nor were we newly out of prison and struggling with sobriety. This just all seems way too fast to me. Who is this guy? Why are you letting him into your life, when you have a little girl at home? It creeps me out. And normally age isn't a huge thing with me - with established, healthy, confident people. But Amber is a hot mess, who is emotionally stunted from having a child and getting into drugs at such a young age. What in the world could she possibly have in common with this dude? Just the fact that they're both recovering addicts? I don't really see that as being a good jumping off place. 

I did appreciate how he was with Gary. When they were meeting up, I was worried it was going to be some macho pissing on Amber as their territory thing. But they seemed to do a fine job of discussing things like civilized people. And I mentioned a few weeks ago it might be better if Amber and Gary didn't talk as much, since they always get each other riled. Like Gary cancelling a visit because Amber yells at him. Fuck that. Forget Amber, what about Leah? She was looking forward to that, you lazy fuck. Oh, and Payless bags rule! 

So, is Maci not coming back at all? The fact that she's participated in the After Show leads me to believe she gives in at some point. I don't usually mind Maci, but she can lose me with her moral high ground BS. I appreciated that Amber actually recognized having her and HER sordid past on the show was in the same ballpark as Farrah, so why not? No, I really think Maci is just fronting, to try and get more money or something. 

I did find it odd that Ryan kept filming even though she wasn't. You'd think, with his shitty attitude, he'd be all "Thank God!" and throw that mic pack on the floor. I don't know how much they pay the dads, but he must really want it. I certainly hope this doesn't mean we get to suffer through extra solo-Ryan segments. Because I just can't with this dude. One minute he's disgusted by Farrah and her lack of morals, the next he's catcalling random women on the street. Get the fuck outta here with that. 

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